He didn’t know it but I was also living that meaning in that moment.
That’s what purpose is.
It’s not some off in the distance goal.
It’s who you are being in every moment.
Who you are in your relationship
How you parent
How you act with your friends
How you eat, sleep, exercise
How you lead.
It’s all pointed in that direction.
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2. You’re using hierarchy to move people.
You have become so wrapped up in urgency that you are crossing the boundaries into telling people what to do or doing things for them. This serves to make them think that they are useless and that you think you are better than them. Driving stress, poor culture, quiet quitting and high staff churn
3. You have become reliant upon short term negative consequences to cause you to act
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9. People will infer all possible meanings of the leaders communication. If the boss is being mis-interpreted it’s on them to get more skilful at communication.
10. If you interrupt people at their desk to ask for 5 minutes or for help NOW, task switching that is the culture you have chosen and it’s a stressful one to operate within.
11. When people don’t experience their own competence throughout the day their general state is anxious and overwhelmed. It’s on the leader to create that for everyone in the company.
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Guilt often seems to be the thing we’re talking about when we say work life balance
When we are at home we should be at work when at work we should be at home and that’s without considering fitness and friends.
Sometimes it seems like a pursuit of being good enough. Avoiding too much conflict or criticism.
Like we live to make other people happy.
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1. List all the stuff that prevents your from achieving your daily objectives and create a plan for dealing with each one.
2. Set realistic daily objectives.
3. List what you have a tendency to do when things get tough. (Do you distract yourself with a new shiny idea that’s fun to talk about and imagine? Write that down so you recognising it as the enemy when it walks in you’ll be far less likely to fall for its lies).
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More than anything else your energy is contagious.
Enthusiasm and passion are great and I’ve seen leaders carry themselves on it for incredible lengths of time.
But wired energy, nervous energy, hyper vigilant energy, afternoon energy slumps and home energy crashes take their toll on your health, ability to focus, and your significant relationships while also setting the tone for the type of energy running through the business.
The best part is, that these changes don’t require massive investments in time and energy outside of what you’re already committing to.
They just require a change in habit. The reward will be more energy, more focus, more clarity, more calm and more presence.
The potential of where those things will take you and your business are impossible to measure and limited only by your imagination
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These 9 things aren’t easy. They usually come as a set. If you can’t imagine doing one it’s probably because another one is not already in place that is making it seem impossible.
But if you want to be the calm, consistent and stable leader to your team you must operate yourself in a way that creates than calmness, consistency and clarity inside of you. You cannot fake it. The body, your words and your actions give off too many clues. You are the indicator that your team responds to. They will only change when you do.
Are you ready to start spreading calmness and clarity?
Or perhaps a better question, how much longer are you willing
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Every single cell in the body has a 24 hour clock inside of it. The eyes are actually brain, they grew out of it in order to help us navigate the outside world but also to help set this 24 hour clock.
The yellow blue light of the sun low in the sky both in the morning (most importantly) and in the evening is what sets this 24 hour clock.
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I should be helping more at home, I should be helping my team, I should be connecting with the customers and keeping them happy, the show ends if I don’t keep the board happy, I’m getting fat, unhealthy and my sleep is suffering I should be doing more for my health!
The first step I have my clients take is to let go of the should, the must, the have to, even if just for a while.
Focusing on what’s not being done only grows the feeling of hopelessness which grows that feeling of overwhelm and exhaustion.
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They have always been people with a lot of responsibility. CxO’s, Partners, Doctors, Judges, Entrepreneurs etc
But back in my personal training days working with these folks I would be pulling my hair out trying to get them to create the habits necessary to achieve what they were paying me for.
Their lives were just so unpredictable.
They would get incredible results in 21,30 and even 60 day programs but eventually they would regress back to mean and back to the shape they were previously in.
That’s when I started exploring neuroscience and quickly discovered where I was going wrong.
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The guest on the show he listened to was explaining something about the brain.
As a client of mine he knew that this was my area and that I had a different perspective that he’d found useful and adopted himself.
He wanted to know why I didn’t jump in
and if I found it hard to not jump in.
I’m writing this because I think the answer is useful or at least it was to me.
I used to find it REALLY hard to not “correct”.
Something about just leaving it seem unsafe.
The thought is something like,
“He’s wrong, I must speak. What if he thinks I agree with him. I MUST correct him”.
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Did you fail to fulfil your commitments to put your health and energy first yesterday.
Or did you, despite the chaos, take the very steps required to energise yourself putting you in the best possible state for the day.
Did you get sucked into your phone or laptop after work.
Or did you keep your commitment to be present with your family.
Did you operate through anxiety, overwhelm or stress.
Or did you create clarity, peace and focus.
Did you get pulled into urgency, operating reactively
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The brain is a survival machine that creates survival mechanisms to protect itself.
Many of these protection mechanisms can inadvertently cause problems inside an organisation.
The leaders must master these 8 skills to not be taken over by these mechanisms.
That is in part, what it means to lead.
To own your own emotions and behaviours in response to what is happening around you.
Which of these 8 do you most need to place your attention on?
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Contrary to popular belief this ISN’T because you are bad, wrong or because your team are.
In this video
* The belief that makes the need for motivation, willpower, urgency and control inevitable
* Why we actually struggle to achieve our goals and lead others to do the same
* The new understand that if we adopted will change everything from how you lead yourself to how you lead others
* The neuroscience understanding that will transform yours and your teams life
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Your success as a leader will be determined by how you deal with people.
It won’t be defined by your ideas, problem solving, charisma, or brilliance but by how people feel in your organisation.
Do they love working with you and for you. Do they feel valued, inspired, fairly treated, well supported?
This is not just about your current project but will echo into your future.
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You’re supposed to be yourself and say what you think which is the extreme opposite of the old advice, ‘fake it til you make it’.
I speak to leaders all the time who say words to the effect of,
“I know I know my stuff, I know I know my business, why can’t I shake this impostor feeling?”
Eventually every leader realises that you can have all the success in the world. But if you don’t have good quality time and energy left to spend with the people you love then it’s all for nothing. But when it was HUSTLE and HARD WORK that got you where you are it can be hard to believe there is any other way. Yet believe you MUST if you are to start taking steps towards creating it.
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